It’s been awhile since I’ve written a blog post. Life happened and it happened hard. It’s been a rough couple of months to say the least. The hardest part has been saying goodbye to our beloved dog of 16 years.
We were always told that when a dog is at the end of its life, there would be signs. He’d stop eating and drinking. He may become distant or extra clingy. There may be accidents in the house. None of this happened with our Dusty.
About a year ago, Dusty started having seizures. Seizures so severe we thought that it was it. When taking him to the Japanese vet and running tests, there was no evidence of what could be causing the seizures, but they did discover a large tumor in his lung. Though he would cough occasionally, we had no idea that he was suffering from a lung tumor.
Fast forward a year, despite a hard international flight and a couple more seizures, Dusty had been good. He was still our loving “Care Bear”, though he had aged. The cute little puppy that we adopted in our 20’s was now an old dog that could barely hear or see and had a hard time keeping his balance. But, he’d still come up for pets, wagged his tail with excitement when we got home, and followed you around incessantly til he got his food.
That all changed about two months ago when we noticed his coughing was getting worse. We took him to the vet and because his tumor hadn’t grown, they suggested we try some prednisone steroids to help alleviate the cough. And it worked. Until it didn’t.
We were so hopeful and relieved that the medication was initially helping. And it did for about a month and a half. But then the coughing came back with wheezing. And the wheezing turned into restlessness at night. And then he started coughing and sneezing blood. In my heart, I knew it was time.
But why did I feel so guilty?
Making the decision to put Dusty to sleep was the hardest, most gut wrenching decision I’ve ever had to make in my life. I was so conflicted on what the right decision was. On one hand, I knew he was suffering. And that the wheezing and coughing must have been so hard on him. But selfishly, I clung on to the good moments where he’d get excited over food and treats and then come and nuzzle up against my hand because he wanted to get pet. I didn’t want to just give up on him. I didn’t want him to think that we didn’t love him or didn’t want him around. Because of course we did.
Even now, a week later, my heart hurts and my eyes are filled with tears as I think back on the decision. And the only thing that brings me peace with it all has been God’s word. To know that we are called to take care of the animals He has created and make a decision that is most merciful for them.
So I just wanted to share the verses that have given me comfort in knowing that we made the right decision in hopes that it’ll help someone, someday if faced with the same situation.
Know that as much as we love our pets, God does too. They’re a beautiful gift from our loving God. I’m so grateful that God brought us Dusty into our lives and gave us so much time with him.
Scripture to help you when making the decision to say goodbye to your pet:
(click on link to see the actual Bible verse in the English Standard Version)
- Genesis 1: 20-25: God created all creatures and saw that it was good
- Genesis 1: 26: God made humans to have dominion over animals.
- Proverbs 12:10: We should care for the well-being of animals. It is our duty to determine if our animals are suffering too greatly. We are able to make quality of life choices for them.
- Luke 14:5: There was an exemption from Sabbath in being merciful and helping an animal in need. (God cares for animals)
- Psalm 50: 10-11: God create and knows all the animals and they are His.
- Revelation 21: 4: One day, death will be no more. We have hope in this.
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